The Nervous Gamewarden

W

Weasel-UT

New member
Last night I was telling my adult son about sharing the stories of hunting with Pat and he thought I should share his favorite hunting story of mine. I kind of hesitate as this isn't predator hunting and I don't want ya'll to get the wrong idea about me. This happened years ago when I was just a youngster of 35 or so. :rolleyes: I've grown up a bit now. /ubbthreads/images/graemlins/wink.gif Well, here goes. Remember, I'm a responsible adult now! /ubbthreads/images/graemlins/laugh.gif

My buddy and I had permission to deer hunt on private property that bordered National Forest land. We arrived near dark on Friday evening and got our gear unloaded. The land owner gave us keys to his cabin and it was a great place to stay. We got up early Sat. morning and still hunted around a large basin and had plans of eating lunch at the cabin. It was late morning and we were resting on a ridge above the dirt road that led to the cabin. We saw a dark green pickup with an emblem on the door moving slowly up the road towards the cabin. We recognized it as a Gamewarden's truck and watched as he parked quietly in the brush. The warden got out of the truck and started sneaking up the road and occasionally looking through his binoculars towards the cabin. He was moving slowly and at times walking through the brush. We wondered what he was up too when all of a sudden we realized that he was probably looking for us thinking we were tresspassers. Somebody must have seen us drive in the night before and reported us. I had a reputation of sneaking/stalking up on people and critters at the time. My buddy looked at me with a huge grin on his face and said "I bet ya can't sneak-up on him" oh yeah, I said! I couldn't turn down a challenge like that, so off the hill I went. I worked my way quietly down the hill and got on the Gamewarden's trail. When he stopped to peer around the brush with his binoculars, I stopped. When he moved, I moved but with a much longer stride so I could close the distance. I was matching him foot-fall for foot-fall and closing in. Finally, I was right behind him. He was so intense on studying the area in front of him that he had no clue I was only inches away. He stopped behind a big juniper, leaned around it, and brought his binoculars to his eyes. I leaned over his back, almost touching him with my chest. I had my face right next to his head. All of a sudden in the deepest rumbling voice I could muster I loudly said, SEE ANYTHING? /ubbthreads/images/graemlins/laugh.gif He went straight up in the air and his feet were doing a dance the likes I've never seen before! His feet were stomping up and down 'bout 90 MPH while he spun in circles, his arms flailing the air like he was trying to take flight and his eyes were about the size of pie tins! He stumbled into a sage bush and fell on his butt! Thank God he didn't fall on any yucca of which there was alot of. He said "WHAT THE #@&% is wrong with you? You dumb @$$ SOB! YOU SCARED THE $#!+ OUTTA ME!" His eyes were bugging out of his head and he was shaking like my ex-boss Pat did when he saw a coyote. My buddy was on the hillside screaming-laughing, holding his sides and literally rolling on the ground. I was trying to keep from laughing as I now had one angry warden flopping around on the ground like a fish out of water, a MAD fish out of water! With the calmest most sincere voice, I said oh, I'm sorry, did I startle you? I reached down to grab his hand and help him to his wobbly legs. He said as I was helping him to his feet "you scared the everloven $#!+ outta me! What the #*&+ is wrong with you? You dumb @$$ed SOB!" I fully expected to get a boot facial and have the boot prints washed off with a blast of pepper spray. My buddy was making his way down the hill but barely able to walk as he was still laughing. The warden told me "don't ever do that again" and started stomping off down the road to his truck. He never asked if we had written permission, licenses or anything. As he passed close to my partner coming off the hill he never said a word to him. My buddy was still doubled over laughing and the gamewarden just kept his head down. When my buddy got over to where I was waiting he asked if I had seen the front of the wardens pants. Yep! according to my partner, they were wet! /ubbthreads/images/graemlins/laugh.gif

I actually made friends with the warden after this. I was always out in that area and he was new. I saw him often. He would always try to get me to admit that I snuck up on him on purpose and I'd always laugh till tears were rolling down my face and deny it.
He said he learned a valuable lesson that day, to always watch his back-trail.
I too learned a valuable lesson. Never do that again! At least with a partner that can't control his laughter! /ubbthreads/images/graemlins/laugh.gif
 
Weasle-UT,

That was GREAT!I'm wiping the tears from my eyes as I write this.My wife and daughter are in the other room asking if I'm done laughing yet-I said no.
It sure is nice to laugh after reading what the politicians have been doing.

Thanks,
Mike
 
Weasel UT,
Great story.I'm still laughing.I've got a game warden story also.
Back in my college days,me and a buddy did alot of trapping for fox.We were fairly challanged in the finance department,so neither one of us had our liscence.(don't tell my son)My buddy and I had split up on this particular property.After we each finished we would meet and head back to the truck.We were walking along a hill when a man on the other side of the valley yelled out to us,and waved us over.As we got closer we realized it was a game warden.Boy I was nervous about the liscence situation.Well the game warden slid down the bank and crossed the large creek at the bottom of the hill.If this was a movie,the weird music would start now and everything would switch to slow motion.As the game warden attempted to climb the bank on our side,he reached out for assistance from my friend.My buddy pretended to help him then gave him one good push.Over top of the load splash,I heard my buddy yell'Run',and of he went.30 seconds later he was followed by a very wet game warden.I stood there for a minute not knowing what to do.I decided to head to the truck to save my friend from the angry,wet game officer.As I approahed the truck,I heard laughing;and there stood my buddy,the wet game warden(not laughing)and game warden#2(laughing).Apparently,warden #2 had stayed there while his rookie partner(the wet one)went looking for us.The senior warden was so amused,he let us go with only a warning.That was probably one of the most educational days of my college carreer.
 
Weasel and Cross, Thanks to both of you. After the day I had those two made me LMAO. I really needed that.
Thanks again.
 
Weasel, I think your my most favorite author, yep you should compile all your stories together and get them published and when your famous don't forget the little people who pushed you into it. /ubbthreads/images/graemlins/laugh.gif
 
Weasel-UT--Another EXCELLENT story my friend! If you keep writing stories like this, you better start compiling them into a book. I think you may have found a career as a writer!!
 
If only I could spell, and punctuate, and use proper English and sentence structure and knew where to begin or end a paragraph or sentence etc. etc. :rolleyes:
Cross, I have a similar story but don't dare post it until I'm sure the statute of limitations has passed. /ubbthreads/images/graemlins/laugh.gif
Yeah, I have alot of ah...uh....umm..adventures to share. I'm not one to let fear of consequences get in the way of a good time. /ubbthreads/images/graemlins/laugh.gif

Thanks for the kind words friends!
 
A TOAST_ to you WeasleUT, I love game warden stories but the ones I've heard depict a superhero what hunts the hunters. Not ones what pi$$ they pants!
 
Like I said at the beginning of my story, I hesitated to relate this event. It wasn't the smartest thing I've ever done and I don't want anybody to think that the Gamewarden was anything less than a man willing to take on one of the most dangerous jobs there is.

I agree that Gamewardens are Superheros. How many people would take on a job of policing people that are most likely armed, out in the woods, at all hours of the day or night and generally do it all by themselves? From what I've heard, the two most dangerous law enforcement jobs are Border Patrol officer and Gamewarden. Gamewardens are called upon to save drowning fishermen & duckhunters at great risk to themselves, they recover bodies, they track poachers for miles at times knowing that the poachers are armed and possibly willing to use their guns inorder to escape prosecution, and they do much more for us and the wildlife. Without Gamewardens, we wouldn't have the hunting/fishing opportunities that we have today. I'll never reveal the name of the Gamewarden in my story out of respect for him. He was brand new, learned something that day and has learned plenty since. Like I said, we became friends after our first meeting and I know what kind of a man he is today, and that is a Superhero!

Woodcock, I like your analogy "a superhero what hunts the hunters". We, as predator hunters, hunt the hunters, but the Gamewarden hunts the hunters that can shoot back!
 
please let me reiterate. The story you told was precious. All I can tell you is that I broke up all morning thinking about it. Hysterical! As I read my own post, which seemed amusing at 5am, would be misconstrude. I am sorry that I left my post like that.
That was a wounerful story and please don't hold back on the next one cause it was perfect.
When I was very young, My fathers best friend was a warden in Maine. My dad would leave me in the middle of ..nowhere with people I even seen bafore to go out at night with him and hunt people jacklighting. I've spent many nights in wardens outposts as my dad and bob working the nights. So many stories of that kind of police work that still makes my hair stand on end when I ask my dad to tell me again.
No! these guys are superheros and a funny little story is what they need to! Funny Is Funny and thats funny.
 
You guys a killin me here! /ubbthreads/images/graemlins/laugh.gif /ubbthreads/images/graemlins/laugh.gif Along the same lines, I have a buddy Mike, who is one of those guys that can bring a Monk to tears with his antics.He's the type that has an innocent face, and uses it, as his secret weapon. Were fishing one night below a dam on the Ohio. Nothing was biting so were loaded up, preparing to hike out. When a young Warden with a big attitude waits half way up the hill for us, then demands our license. Mike looks him square in the face and says, "nope". I think oh no, here we go. So..I'm not sure what to do, and I know Mike has a fishing liscense. About this time the Warden says, "what did you say"? Mike tells him, "if your too lazy to come check us down there, and walk all the way up the hill with us your not gettin it! He proceeds to drop his gear, and take off running. I was in shock, here's mike a college distance runner on a full scholarship, being chased by a Warden doing his best to catch him. I just went ahead, and sat down to watch the unfolding show. At about 250 yards Mike is getting good and warmed up, and this poor warden is slowing to a stagering walk, trying to catch his breath, but also not giving up on the chase. The warden gets moving again, and I realize he is slowly being led down the hill to where we were fishing to begin with. So Mike gets to the bottom, which is where I fully expect him to run up the hill, to make an escape from an exausted Warden, when he sits down on a big boulder, and waits a couple of minutes for the Warden to catch up. Upon the Wardens arrival, he plops down on the rock next to my buddy, and Mike hands him his fishing liscense. This warden tells mike, "It took me about 300 yards to figure out what the hell you were doing, but it was apparent that I needed the exercise badly"! Ten minutes later,these two walk the hill together like they had been pals for years. I would still be in jail if I tried nonsense like that....lol
 
i have a buddy that was hunting in eather wyo. or nm. for lope when he was driving down a two track when he sees a lope that just passes behind a hill.. so clif is going about 5 mph and stops to back up to take another look at the lope!! what he didn't know was a female warden had slipped in right on his bumper.. he puts it in reverse and crushes the front of her truck!! scares the s$%^ out of him.. he did not get in any trouble because she knew he did not know she was there and was too close!! you should hear him tell it!! lol
 
Woodcock, I just wanted to make sure nobody gets the wrong idea and if a young impressionable person were to read this I wouldn't want them thinking it was alright. Chances are, if the warden was as experienced as most are, the outcome would have been different. In all my years of hunting and fishing I only know of three wardens that are what one would call less than exemplary in their duties. One warden I had a bad experiance with and I didn't let the other two catch me. :rolleyes: My wife wants me to relate one of those "escape" stories because she was involved too, but it is a bit ah.........edgy, shall we say? I was, 100% legal too, so was my friend, but I watched the warden confiscate his rifle and accuse my partner and I of trespassing when we were standing on a state highway. It's another one of those long stories. :rolleyes: /ubbthreads/images/graemlins/laugh.gif

Ridgeviewer, your buddy sounds like a fun guy to go fishing with! /ubbthreads/images/graemlins/laugh.gif LOL

Grandpa Fudge, The Warden your buddy had the "run-in" with should have been cited for tailgating! /ubbthreads/images/graemlins/laugh.gif /ubbthreads/images/graemlins/laugh.gif
 
if you want another story about a nervous gamewarden... after the legendary vern brandt was caught between a couple pack mules hi in the back country of the sierras and had to retire ( vern had a habit of popping out of the trees 15 or 20 mls from anywhere and searching pack trains for any illeagal fish and game) a new warden took his place!! when tom came on the scene he thought he would be finding people with over limits or no lic.. thay were nice people that had made a little mistake and he would have to write them a ticket and that was that!! if tom was near his truck he would not even wear his gun!! soooooooooo one day tom saw a guy fishing from the bridge over the owens river north of lone pine.. tom stops and asks if he was doing any good and made small talk than he told the guy he would have to move off the bridge and fish down below.. with out warning the guy hit tom in the mouth knocking him to the ground and pulling a pistol and shooting at tom who just kept rolling untill the guy ran out of shell and jumped in his car and drove off!! tom .. by the grace of god did not get hit by any of the shots!! they caught the escaped murderer some where in nev. the next day!! i don't know if toms pants were wet but i am sure mine would be!! tom wore his gun after that and never took any for granite after that!!!! i knew tom for a few years after that but havnt been up there for years>> a warden told me tom was getting close to retirement and was still a great guy!! good luck tom!!! thats the story of another nervous warden!! grandpa fudge
 
Great stories guys. It good to be able to get a good laugh like that now and then. In the times we live now a man would have to be real careful doing some of those shananigans to a law officer. I have a friend that is an IN DNR officer and he has some stories that will make you wet yourself too. What a hoot some of the people those folks have to deal with (from the other side of the fence). /ubbthreads/images/graemlins/laugh.gif
 
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